Tuesday, January 04, 2005

The only interesting part of the game

"Well, that went well," I say, smirking.

The halftime show of the Orange Bowl has just drawn to a close. The crowd is booing Ashlee Simpson*, who has shouted herself hoarse to try to make up for the fact that she can't hear herself through the monitors. I picture her storming backstage, ready to impale the first soundman she finds, only to discover that Kelly Clarkson and Trace Adkins are already bearing the unfortunate engineer's head on a pike.

The camera cuts back to the sportscasters in the booth. Their voices resemble the staticky remarks of embedded reporters in the Iraqi desert.

"Someone ran over a cable somewhere," the s.o.** guesses.

* Probably not unusual, in and of itself.

** A longtime soundman.


Gawker covers the event. Heh.